Well. Would it make you feel better if I told you, that while in the moment she may have looked a mess and was crying, even now she feels like a worthless toilet whore. But... if you look past that. she's actually happy? Not just because it's something that makes her useful. But because she's getting her freak on and we're letting her? It's complicated. She both hates, and loves it, and for different reasons. Fetishes and kinks are a weird thing to explain. There's mixed emotions for her too. But like fear, it's a feeling often seeked out. For her, the degredation, and humiliation is her adrenaline rush much like skydiving is to those who face their fear of heights. Or people who ride rollar coasters. That fear of something bad happening, and then you do it and you're fine afterwards. For her, it's being treated like a toilet, and forced to endure it and being used that's her drug of choice.
